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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24715783">After the subconscious mission</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mary2442/pseuds/Mary2442'>Mary2442</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>MacGyver (TV 2016)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 00:42:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,785</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24715783</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mary2442/pseuds/Mary2442</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hi !</p>
<p>This is a short story about Mac and Riley. (Characters are not mine).<br/>Alternative ending season 4 episode 10, when Mac comes home after the mission where he had to visit his subconscious memories in Tesla' house.</p>
<p>Enjoy your reading !</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Riley Davis &amp; Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>45</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>After the subconscious mission</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Mac ! Can we talk ?”, asked Desi, closing furiously the car door.</p>
<p>“I'm fine. I don't want to talk.” </p>
<p>“You never want to talk with me, since your father is dead you always push me away”</p>
<p>She was starting to annoy him.</p>
<p>“I'm not in the mood, Desi.”</p>
<p>He unlocked his house door and sank into it. </p>
<p>“Where is Riley ?”, asked Desi, entering into the house behind him and looking around.</p>
<p>“She went shopping for food”.</p>
<p>“Right”, Desi hasn't wanted to have this conversation with Riley around, maybe if they were just the two of them, he gonna surrender. “Mac, you lived hard weeks and today you underwent a subconscious mission. I was there I can tell you were sad and anxious in your sleep. What happened ? What did you see ?”</p>
<p>He was exhausted and had no desire to talk about it with her.</p>
<p>“Desi, i'm sorry, but I have no need to talk about it. I just need some sleep !”</p>
<p>He went to the bedroom and she followed him.</p>
<p>“ I'm fed up, Mac !” he could tell that she was upset.</p>
<p>He turned around to face her. He wanted to say something, but she goes ahead first :</p>
<p>“You won, I give up. You don't want to talk, I'll not force you, I'm tired to fight with you all the time.”</p>
<p>Desi, my father is dead, I learned the same day that my mother was killed by our government and now I just relived...”, he stopped and looked at this feet. </p>
<p>He didn't want to share this little dream whit her. Why not ? She was his girlfriend and the last person who was linked to him in his life. Maybe that was the problem. He had lost so many people in his life. He had desperately kept Desi in his life to be sure that he will not alone. <br/>He raised his head to look at her. Now that he was aware of this, he was feeling released. He understood why he had wasted so much energy to keep her in his life without being able to truly enjoy their relationship. </p>
<p>“What ? You relived what ?”, Desi asked, impatiently.</p>
<p>“Nothing...”</p>
<p>He had to be honest with her. He needed someone to be there for him, now more than ever, but it wasn't Desi. The proof was, he couldn't even speak with her about what he was feeling. She was just not the person he needed, even if he tried his best to make her that person. But she wasn't, he had to accept it.<br/>She was in front of him waiting for him to tell her something, she wasn't patient or loving or even caring. It was just sex, they had always solved problems between them, using this way. This whole time, he was blinded, he didn't love this woman. He had put her in this exact place in his life to be sure she would stay. He could see his mistake now, and he didn't want to pursue it.</p>
<p>“... Desi, I think we should stop.”, he said abruptly.</p>
<p>“What ?”, she asked meanly. “You want us to broke up, after everything I did for you ? All the nights I tried to help you, to understand you ?”, she was pissed.</p>
<p>You tried to... what ? You never tried anything, you used to tell me that I had to go to sleep or that I had to think about other things, that with time I will forget. You hugged me, telling me that I had to move forward.”, he was angry and upset.</p>
<p>“Yes, you have to, you can't keep it for you and keep suffering in the same way, in life when something goes wrong we have to move forward !”</p>
<p>And then, it hit him.</p>
<p>“You need that ! You are the one who needs to move forward without looking behind. I'm not like you Desi !”</p>
<p>She looked at him as if he had slapped her, her face was determined. Then, she turned her back on him and left the house, slamming the door violently behind her.<br/>He stayed in the middle of the entrance, he felt lost. Now it was real, he was completely alone. Suddenly, he felt his eyes fill with tears, he looked around him and the stairs caught his eyes. He climbed upstairs and entered in the attic. <br/>He found the cardboard where he had gathered all the family stuffs and opened it. <br/>He felt in his knees and let the tears rolled on his cheeks, looking at a picture of them : his mother, his father and in the middle, a little two year old boy was smiling: him.<br/>Why his whole life had been so mean to him ? What did he do to deserve that ?</p>
<p>….......................................................</p>
<p>Riley entered into the house with her bags full of food. She put it on the ground in the kitchen and tidied the cupboards and the fridge. Usually, they did that together, but she hadn't heard Mac. <br/>Once she had done. She was starting to cook pasta with tomato sauce, when she heard a noise, it was coming from above her. </p>
<p>“The attic ?”, she said to herself.</p>
<p>She stopped the gas stove and went ahead of the stairs. She climbed it and pushed the door slowly. <br/>There, in the middle of the room Mac was squatting, back to her. </p>
<p>“Desi, I'm not ready to have this discussion.”, he said, without turning around.</p>
<p>Her heart broke at the sound of his voice, he was crying.</p>
<p>“Huh, no it's me, Mac, but I let you alone if you want.”, Riley apologized.</p>
<p>Mac turned around quickly, drying his tears and stood up. </p>
<p>“Riley ? I thought it was Desi.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, I understood that, I didn't meet her in the house.”</p>
<p>“We argued and she's gone.”</p>
<p>“I'm sorry for you, but i'm sure a discussion will help when you will be ready.”</p>
<p>“No Riles, we broke up.”</p>
<p>“It was an agreement ?”</p>
<p>“Not really..., I just understood that I kept her in my life to be sure I will never be alone.” he avowed.</p>
<p>“Mac, I told you, you will never be alone ! I'm here and I will always be”, she approached him.</p>
<p>She could see the picture in his hands. When he saw her looking at it, he hid it behind his back by reflex.<br/>She looked back at him:</p>
<p>“ It was a hard mission today, huh.”, she tried.</p>
<p>“Yeah, it was exhausting. Did I do or said anything when I was sleeping ?”, he wanted to know.</p>
<p>“You had cried and yelled, but you said nothing intelligible.”, she smiled at him to show him that she supported him.</p>
<p>He noticed that she was asking for nothing, she was just checking if he was okay. He felt grateful for that. <br/>He pulled the picture out from behind his back. Looking at it he started talking :</p>
<p>“This is a picture of my parents and me. I was two years old.”, he smiled, lost in his memories. “I don't remember it, I don't have more than two or three memories with her. And my dad. After all this time spending to research him, I found out that he was my boss and I avoided him during almost a year.”, he said between sobs.</p>
<p>He raised his head to look at her, tears rolling down his cheeks.</p>
<p>“ Until you told me to give him a chance. And when I started to, finally, have a good relation with him, cancer is arrived and then, codex.”, he ran his thumb on the picture.</p>
<p>Riley came closer to him and put a hand on his shoulder. He looked back at her trying to smile. He half failed, so he just put his own hand on hers. </p>
<p>“Today, in this dream, I saw my mom.”, he confessed.</p>
<p>“You,... you saw your mom ?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, I was in this house and there was a party with people I don't even know. And I lost myself, I didn't even remember why I was over there or who I was, I was scared and lost. And she appeared. I begged her to help me, to told me what I had to do. I told her that I needed her.”, his tears were intensified. “It's ridiculous, I-”</p>
<p>“No, Mac, it's not ! She's your mother, you were lost, your subconscious helped you. How was she ?”, Riley asked gently. </p>
<p>It was the first question she posed to know what happened and it doesn't bother him to answer. </p>
<p>“She was beautiful, she has passed her hand in my hair like when I was a toddler. She smiled at me the same way, she reassured me, she sang this song she always sang when I was afraid, she told me that she loved me, she-”, he couldn't continue because of his sobs.</p>
<p>“She did what a mom do for her child.”, Riley finished for him, hugging him.</p>
<p>He closed his arms behind her back and held her tighter against him.</p>
<p>“Thank you”, he whispered in her hair.</p>
<p>“Always.”</p>
<p>At this exact moment, he could feel his heart warmed up, full of love. Riley was this person he needs, and she will always be there for him.</p>
<p>“And don't worry, we will find a way to solve this problem. Together.”</p>
<p>They stayed like this in the middle of the attic until he calm down and breath almost regularly. He was more exhausted than earlier, but he felt light, steady and loved. <br/>He released his grip around her. She smiled at him :</p>
<p>“I cooked pasta with tomato sauce, it surely cold by now, but, are you hungry ?”</p>
<p>He smiled at her genuinely.</p>
<p>“I'm starving !”</p>
<p>She nodded and invited him to come down. He looked one last time at the picture and put it onto the box.</p>
<p>“Take it with you.”</p>
<p>“If I want to move forward I need to forget, and for that, to let this kind of stuff here.”</p>
<p>“Where did you hear that ? No, Mac, if you want to move forward you need to live with it, you can't just forget. Your parents are still your parents, even if they are not here anymore. You love them and you always will, it's normal and with time it's just gonna be more simple. I don't tell you to decorate all the house with family pictures, but you can get one, down with you.”</p>
<p>He looked at her pensively. It was the exact opposite of what Desi told him. However, it was exactly what he needed.<br/>He recovered the photo and followed her on the stairs. <br/>They warmed up the pasta and ate it silently, thinking about their long day. He gradually  understood that the person we need in our lives, we don't choose them, and in his life, for now, he needed Riley.</p>
<p>END</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading !</p>
<p>I hope you liked it !</p>
<p>If you have an advice or comment, please let me know !</p></blockquote></div></div>
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